Oakland Unseen's editorial staff officially endorses Einstein the dog for Mayor of Oakland in the November 4, 2014 election. We thoroughly evaluated all 20+ candidates, read their Tinder profiles and platforms, researched which special interests are funding their campaigns, and we found that Einstein the dog surprisingly had a more complete platform than most candidates.
Einstein’s 30-point platform shows that he will bring reform to Oakland’s police force, work for economic justice, and bring transparency to how city funds are spent. Einstein is a candidate of action who’s not afraid to go the extra mile for Oakland, and that’s why Oakland Unseen is proud to award him with our much-coveted endorsement.
(Image credits: http://einsteinforoakland.org)
Nobel Laureates are taking over all of the campus parking at UC Berkeley (photo credit: Daniel Gries)
Berkeley is a notoriously difficult city to park in. But historically, it’s been easier if you’ve won a Nobel Prize, as UC Berkeley gives its Nobel Laureates free parking in the best locations on campus. However, Oakland Unseen has recently discovered that campus parking is running out due to the rapidly growing number of Nobel Prize winners at Cal.
UC Berkeley’s latest Nobel winner Randy Schekman told Oakland Unseen, “I was going to park in my typical spot, but George Smoot had already parked his Telsa there. So, I went over to my backup spot, but Charles Townes’s Ferrari was already there. In desperation, I went around the backside of the Chemistry building, but Yuan Lee had his winnebago parked there. At this rate, in another year or two, all the available parking on campus will require NL permits, and if I arrive after 10am—I may have to park in the—[gasp]—Telegraph-Channing Garage!”
Oakland Unseen reached out to UC Berkeley’s Department of Parking and Transportation for further comment. An official replied that they’re researching replacing Evans Hall with an underground parking structure similar in size as the Underhill lot specifically for Nobel Laureates. The estimated completion date is 2025.
(Image credit: Stanford University)
In an effort to change its status as the snobbiest city in America, the Palo-Alto-based Stanford University has admitted its first middle class student. With tuition at a staggering $42,000 per year, plus room and board and country club fees, Stanford officials said that they don’t typically admit students whose families make under $200K per year, but made an exception for this fall’s freshman class.
"Guess I’ll move to Oakland!" stencil spotted by photographer Joe Sciarrillo in front of City College of San Francisco, 22nd Street and Bartlett, San Francisco.
Brace Yourself - The Burning Man Kickstarter projects are coming.
Nine frontrunners for Oakland’s 2014 Mayor’s race are on Tinder, Oakland Unseen recently discovered through an anonymous source in City Hall. These candidates are using Tinder to connect with Millennial voters in Oakland who will likely decide who will become Oakland’s next mayor in the November 4 election. Tinder is a smartphone-based dating app that’s exploded in popularity because of its ease of use—requiring the user just to swipe left for people they don’t like, and swipe right for people they do.
Since receiving this scoop, Oakland Unseen’s investigative reporting unit has conducted a months-long investigation alongside our nonprofit reporting partners, funded by several public-interest journalism grants.
Jason Overman, Rebecca Kaplan’s spokesman, said of the Tinder revelation, “Tons of people nowadays are using Tinder to hookup with singles in Oakland. Why not use the app to court the young adult vote? We’ve got to stay one foot in front of the competition.”
However, Kaplan could be falling behind. Records obtained from Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) requests show that soon after Kaplan joined Tinder to ‘connect’ with prospective Oakland voters, several other candidates joined Tinder, including Mayor Jean Quan, Councilmember Libby Schaaf, City Auditor Courtney Ruby, Port Commissioner Bryan Parker, civil-rights attorney Dan Siegel, community activist Jason “Shake” Anderson, neighborhood watch leader Patrick McCullough, and overly optimistic professor Joe Tuman.
An unnamed source at City Hall told Oakland Unseen: “Nowadays, voters are expecting a candidate to go the extra mile. They don’t want just leaflets at their door, but sometimes they want to know their candidate intimately. And how far they will go on the issues that matter most to them,” our source said, removing their glasses and pausing dramatically. “Yes, it’s a viral marketing campaign (hopefully just in one way), but that’s what you have to do nowdays to get elected,” our source said before disappearing behind a curtain.
When Oakland Unseen reached out to Tinder about whether or not this violates Tinder’s user agreement, Tinder’s CMO Justin Mateen replied, “I’m not sure, can I get back to you? I have some other things I need to take care of right now.”
Oakland Unseen has obtained each of the Oakland mayoral candidate’s Tinder profiles, and they’re below.
Tinder illustrations by Krusty Wheatfield, http://www.krustywheatfield.com.
Oakland’s City Council met Wednesday night at a special session to add changes to the Coliseum’s 10-year lease agreement with the A’s. The A’s spent the last 14 months negotiating their contract, only to have additional conditions added at the last minute by the City Council. Oakland Unseen recently obtained a copy of the proposed amendments to the 10-year lease agreement, and they’re listed below:
- Bernie Lean must be played between every inning.
- Proposed statue of Lew Wolff must face south towards Fremont/San Jose.
- Must have séance with the ghost of Al Davis before making any major changes to Coliseum.
- City Council required to consult with San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee/ former mayor Gavin Newsom for help on how to keep a pro sports team in your city.
- No signage allowed in stadium, including advertising, section markers, and retired jerseys.
- To preserve the Coliseum’s delicate plumbing, must hold handle extra long to flush.
- Tear down Coliseum BART bridge to preserve the habitat of burrowing owls who nest between BART tracks and stadium parking lot.
- Mark up beer another $10 a cup.
- Garlic fries can only be sold at the top of Mount Davis, to make fans exercise before eating fatty foods.
- Allow a sitting City Council member to throw out first pitch/sing national anthem no fewer than 3 times a season.
- Sonny Gray must personally deliver any amendments to agreement to mayor, shirtless.
- Any changes to scoreboard must be approved by 2/3rds of California voters.
Billy Beane, the General Manager of the Oakland Athletics. (Image credit: The Greatest Sign Maker).
Billy Beane, the Oakland A’s General Manager who became famous for recruiting overlooked players in the book and film Moneyball, is at it again in Oakland. This time, he’s using his statistical modeling and skill profiling to find and recruit rising politicians overlooked in other cities who would be a good fit for Oakland’s City Council. Time will tell whether or not his latest efforts will pay off, and whether or not Brad Pitt will play him in Moneyball II: The Rise of Quan.
Image from January 30, 2009 March Against Police Brutality in the wake of the Oscar Grant shooting (photo by Joe Sciarrillo in Bay Area Underground).
Protesters gently arrested in Downtown Oakland at the January 30, 2009 March Against Police Brutality in the wake of the Oscar Grant shooting (Photo by Joe Sciarrillo in Bay Area Underground).
Jingletown, Oakland is home to a number of artists, innovative businesses, and holds regular open studios, which The New York Times will “discover” in about 5 years.
(Oakland is Proud sign at the Brighter Than Blight exhibit)
East Oakland has been a news desert for the last 7 years. We don’t know actually what’s going on there. Yes, there is reporting from the Coliseum, but no one in the journalism community has gone into Deep East Oakland in so long, we’re not sure what’s actually there anymore. Eastmont Mall? Castlemont? Oakland Unseen will get back to you on what we find.